Ottawa Senators Limerick

The 9-stanza Sens poem you probably never wanted

Ottawa Senators Limerick
Photo by Nick Fewings / Unsplash

It's been a quiet couple weeks in Sens land, which means my mind has gone where it often goes—poetry. And no, I'm not talking about lyrical sonnets and moving haikus, I'm talking about dumb rhymes that often take on the cadence of a limerick in my head. So for today, the day after the only Sens game in a span of 7 days, I decided to put metaphorical pen to metaphorical paper and limerickally praise the team we love.

First, Chuckie, Norris, and Terry
Their combo has turned out quite scary
Josh's slapper, Vlad's a sniper
Brady chirps like the Pied Piper
How annoying can they be? Very

Next we have Timmy with Claude
The huge age gap there hasn't showed
You throw in Matty Jo
With how fast he can go
And this line is *chef's kiss* à la mode

Then we have Drake, Roby, Kuby
What can't they do(o)? Call 'em Scooby
This third line, as decreed,
They have skill, they have speed
All while Järvy's a bona fide newbie

The fourth line's like spoon, knife, and fork
Zack or Highmore are knives with high torque
Kells as fork is a winner
Since he'll feed you your dinner
And the versatile spoon there is Rourke

The top pairing has Jake the Snake
When he skates with the puck, ankles break
If you turn on the tube
The fans all shout ZUUUUUUB
Who helps our D-man baby eat steak

Up next's Bernard-Docker with Chych
The latter can sure whip his stick
So pumped when he came
Gramps was at his first game!
I sure hope Chabot heals up quick

The third pair is Hammer and Bränny
The first one's shot-blocking's uncanny
While for Erik we sing
Praise to our short king
This pair covers each nook and cranny

In net we've got Korpi and Fors
The end (we hope) to goalie wars
Since this excellent tandem
Weren't chosen at random
Our Nordic pair to keep low scores

So this is the team as it stands
But it's still notably undermanned
Bring back Kasty, bring back Greig
Release Pinto, we beg
Then resume the parade route we've planned


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