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What kind of Sens fan are you?

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A helpful little quiz to help you figure out where exactly you fall on the homer-to-pessimist scale.

I have no idea where the puck is in this picture, but thankfully none of the players in this picture know either.
I have no idea where the puck is in this picture, but thankfully none of the players in this picture know either.
Jerome Miron-USA TODAY Sports

Ever wondered what kind of Sens fan you are? Of course you have. I'm sure we've all been called out at one point or another as being "not a real fan". Now I believe that's not true, and that different fans just fall into different categories. And of course, I clearly know more about your preferences than any of you do, so I thought I'd help you out. Clearly, it's impractical for me to visit each reader individually, so I thought I'd put together this little quiz to help you out. Just keep track of your answers on something you don't need anymore (like an Alfredsson autograph, or a Spezza hockey card, or a Ryan jersey) and then find out at the end!

 

1. Who's gonna win the Stanley Cup this year?

A) The best team in the NHL

B) With our luck, the Leafs

C) Who cares?

D) Ottawa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

2. Jared Cowen is...

A) A Sens defenseman. Aren't quizzes normally supposed to be difficult?

B) Utterly useless

C) Someone I'm sure I'll hear about if he has a bounce back year

D) Awesome! Time for a bounce-back season! Don't call it a comeback! #Cowen4Lyfe

 

3. Eugene Melnyk is...

A) The Sens owner. Seriously, do these questions get any harder?

B) A lying, cheating, cash-strapped idiot

C) Probably having fun somewhere in the Carribbean

D) Bringing a casino to Kanata!!!!!!!!!

 

4. What are you most excited for this upcoming season?

A) The hockey. I'm just skipping to the bottom, this exam is a waste of my time.

B) Watching the Sens push for a playoff spot too late, only to watch them finish 2 points too low

C) The end of all this offseason filler

D) Too many to list! A healthy Karlsson, a healthy Ryan, the goaltending battle, rookies with a chance to make an impact...

 

5. Will Bobby Ryan sign an extension?

A) ...

B) Only if Ottawa gets relocated to Philadelphia

C) Only for the same reason that I'd start watching the games again: if Ottawa starts to win

D) Absolutely! Everybody wants to be a Sens lifer!

 

Now, tally up your answers. If you answered...

Mostly A)s: You are a non-descript Sens fan. You see it like it is, and tell it like it is.

You probably enjoy vanilla ice cream and soft rock radio. You don't have time for blather or opinion or Denis Potvin. You just want the facts. I'd ask for you to share your opinion in the comments, but you probably don't have one. Feel free to comment anyway. Go Sens Go!

Mostly B)s: You are a "sky-is-falling" pessimistic Sens fan.

Murphy's Law is exactly that: a law. You used to believe that expecting the worst meant you were never disappointed and sometimes pleasantly surprised, but you've come to realize that one out of two ain't bad. However, come what may, this team is your team. You'd rather cheer for these guys who can't get it right than any other unfairly-rich, ungrateful, whiny, and self-centered NHL franchise.

Mostly C)s: You are an apathetic Sens fan. 

Your relationship with the Sens is very similar to your relationship with the Star Wars franchise: fantastic early in your fandom, but there have been too many recent letdowns, and you can't bring yourself to watch the next installment and risk the same heartbreak again. Except that when it comes, you know you'll do it all over anyway. At least when the inevitable letdown comes, you can always fall back to the fact that you stopped caring before it was cool.

Mostly D)s: You are a shameless homer Sens fan.

You probably pick the Sens to win the Cup every year in your office pool. You likely bought a pet cat because your spouse wouldn't let you name your child Spartacat. The 1/! key on your keyboard wore out a long time ago from overuse. Every Sens-related event has a positive. (Karlsson's injured? Chance for the rookie D-men to shine! Melnyk won't spend? He's just saving for when we're a Cup contender again!) And come what may, you will proudly announce to all your friends that Ottawa is the greatest team in the world.